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On the nature of depression
Depression sucks.
I know a number of people who deal with depression on a regular basis. The most common symptom I see when it comes to depression is unhappiness about a perceived lack of self-worth. This can be anything from, "I'm not worth spending this money on" to "I'm such a horrible person and I don't know why anybody even wants to waste time on a worthless slug like me!" There's lots of points in between too.
Just about everybody gets depressed now and again. Self-worth is a very hard thing to pin down but it comes from the inside. Introspection goes to the inside and questions and what-ifs until you're blue in the face - then it gets serious.
Some friends of mine say Depression Lies. This is actually pretty accurate.
When depression talks it talks about the bad stuff. It takes any bit of bad stuff and blows it up into a crisis of epic proportions whether it's a crisis or not. It takes anything questionable and paints it as bad stuff, then does the same thing it does to real bad stuff. It discounts anything good as being either an aberration or unreal.
Discounting real stuff as freak chance is bad enough. Warping neutral into awful is worse.
Depression can breed hopelessness. For example, there have been times I haven't been able to do any work around the house because it looks like a giant solid mass to get done. In truth it's been lots of littler tasks, but I couldn't see that.
Depression is not easy to deal with. If the above points sound like you on a regular basis, discounting the good whilst being miserable in the bad, I suggest doing the following:
1) Concentrate on what is. Yes, there may be bad stuff. There is also good stuff and it matters at least as much as the bad stuff.
2) Remember that it's not all one giant wave of stuff coming at you. Each little task you finish gets a little bit done, and that little bit comes out of the big mass. It's not quite as big after that.
3) If it's hard getting anything at all done, look at a single tiny thing - anything from a single dish to a single piece of trash. Do that one single thing. Wash that dish. Put that piece of trash in the trash. It's just one little thing. Thing is, once you've started doing that one little thing don't let it stop you from doing something similar again.
4) If none of the above work at all, or they don't work very well most of the time, please look into professional help. Professionals can help by listening and by prescribing any medicines that may be appropriate to help balance your brain's chemistry, because make no mistake it is a bit off. It's still up to you to do the work - pick up that piece of paper, for example - but it can be easier if you have a competent professional helping you get your chemical and hormonal balance back in line.
Depression's a constant fight, and the very hopelessness it puts in a brain saps the will to fight it. Even so, fighting depression is fighting the good fight. Reach out for help if you need to - it's probably closer than you think.
I know a number of people who deal with depression on a regular basis. The most common symptom I see when it comes to depression is unhappiness about a perceived lack of self-worth. This can be anything from, "I'm not worth spending this money on" to "I'm such a horrible person and I don't know why anybody even wants to waste time on a worthless slug like me!" There's lots of points in between too.
Just about everybody gets depressed now and again. Self-worth is a very hard thing to pin down but it comes from the inside. Introspection goes to the inside and questions and what-ifs until you're blue in the face - then it gets serious.
Some friends of mine say Depression Lies. This is actually pretty accurate.
When depression talks it talks about the bad stuff. It takes any bit of bad stuff and blows it up into a crisis of epic proportions whether it's a crisis or not. It takes anything questionable and paints it as bad stuff, then does the same thing it does to real bad stuff. It discounts anything good as being either an aberration or unreal.
Discounting real stuff as freak chance is bad enough. Warping neutral into awful is worse.
Depression can breed hopelessness. For example, there have been times I haven't been able to do any work around the house because it looks like a giant solid mass to get done. In truth it's been lots of littler tasks, but I couldn't see that.
Depression is not easy to deal with. If the above points sound like you on a regular basis, discounting the good whilst being miserable in the bad, I suggest doing the following:
1) Concentrate on what is. Yes, there may be bad stuff. There is also good stuff and it matters at least as much as the bad stuff.
2) Remember that it's not all one giant wave of stuff coming at you. Each little task you finish gets a little bit done, and that little bit comes out of the big mass. It's not quite as big after that.
3) If it's hard getting anything at all done, look at a single tiny thing - anything from a single dish to a single piece of trash. Do that one single thing. Wash that dish. Put that piece of trash in the trash. It's just one little thing. Thing is, once you've started doing that one little thing don't let it stop you from doing something similar again.
4) If none of the above work at all, or they don't work very well most of the time, please look into professional help. Professionals can help by listening and by prescribing any medicines that may be appropriate to help balance your brain's chemistry, because make no mistake it is a bit off. It's still up to you to do the work - pick up that piece of paper, for example - but it can be easier if you have a competent professional helping you get your chemical and hormonal balance back in line.
Depression's a constant fight, and the very hopelessness it puts in a brain saps the will to fight it. Even so, fighting depression is fighting the good fight. Reach out for help if you need to - it's probably closer than you think.
no subject
Depression -- at least the kind with a *big* biochemical problem behind it, rather than biochemistry adding to the emotional soup -- is a disease. A serious one. A deadly one, in one case out of five, and since that's only the known, diagnosed cases in which someone actually reached out to get treatment, it's probably way higher than that. It is also only referring to actual suicides, rather than accident or drug deaths caused indirectly by the disease.
All of this means that what Wolf said about getting help, and helping yourself, and struggling as much as you have to to look at the world, and yourself, and what you need to do, with as great a mixture of accuracy and optimism as you can manage, is completely true. But depression causes hopelessness through twp separate methods. It can make you feel hopeless when there is still lots of reason to hope, lots of good to be had.
And then again, it can make you feel hopeless because it *hurts*, and it will go on hurting, and if you are one of the people who need medical intervention to make it hurt less and there is no medical intervention known to humanity which will help... there is very little objective reason to hope anything will get better.
Depression makes you think things are worse than they are. It also makes things bad in very concrete, non-relativistic ways. "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." I am fucking *good* by now at making a lot of my depressive hopelessness go away by learning not to believe in it. That which remains, in the cold light of reason, is real.
Hope that has no basis is as much a lie as the depression ever tells.
no subject
I wish I knew ways to help with that.